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Toxic Womb, Toxic sperm – A story of Renewal
In recent years my work with individuals began to go beyond working with family systems and ancestral healing into the world of deeper personal process – which includes energy healing work and using my ability to see and sense the world of the subtle energy bodies to see the energy and structure behind the story.
What I began to see over and over again is that many of us entered into this world from a toxic womb. Not only did I begin to realise that many individuals were suffering and unable to access the issues and constraints resulting from having survived a toxic womb, but that there were three major areas of womb toxicity that can and do have an impact of the foetus.
The three areas are:
– Chemical toxicity caused by alcohol, cigarettes, drug abuse
– Emotional Toxicity caused by violence, stress, conflict, trauma, self hatred
– Astral Toxicity caused by previous abortions, miscarriages and stillbirths
You may be wondering: why is the foetus not protected? Why was I not protected? When we look at chemical toxicity it is not difficult for most people to understand how and they were affected by alcohol, nicotine or cocaine in their mother’s blood stream. Even when it comes to emotional toxicity it must also be realised that emotional stress such as arguing and disputes and living during a war also have an effect on the mother’s blood chemistry, and therefore on the unborn child. However, there is another layer to emotional toxicity that involves the auric field and the chakras and these are at time indelibly affected until deep healing takes place.
Chemical toxicity can have an impact on us even beyond the womb – the sperm of a father who is under the influence of alcohol, recreational and hard drugs also have an influence both chemically and energetically.
So what happens in the womb? As blood is pumped into the baby’s blood stream via the umbilicus, the forming foetus does not recognise anything coming into it as a foreign substance. The basis is that the umbilicus is the life support system and is designed to nurture life through feeding. Therefore, when nicotine, alcohol, cocaine, heroin and amphetamines pour in they are not recognised as a foreign substance, but rather as something the nurturing mother’s body is providing.
To understand how the presence of these substances can affect the foetus and indeed how they can still be affecting you right now, today and in this moment, we need to ask ourselves what the function of these substances are. Human beings are motivated to avoid pain at all costs, not just physical pain, but we will go to extreme lengths to numb our emotional pain – this is where addictions come into play. Alcohol, nicotine, recreational and hard drugs are designed to numb emotional pain. Long term they do not and it is in reality a fallacy that they relax – quite the opposite, the body goes into high stress.
The presence of these substances in the foetus affect the body chemistry and furthermore what is experienced as normal. From experience, I’ve seen that the neurotransmitters, stem cells and the production of neuropeptides are all directly affected by the presence of alcohol and recreational drugs, thereby setting up a template that can last for many decades into the life of the child, well into adulthood.
These foreign substances are designed to numb the emotional body, create detachment form emotional pain and or to induce a false and exaggerated experience of freedom from emotional pain. When all of these substances are being fed to the foetus through the umbilicus, the child’s body begins to replicate the chemical conditions are ‘normal’.
So what does that mean? It means that you could be living with a deadened, limited or restricted range of emotional experience and be living that as ‘normal’. For example, not understanding the emotional responses of others, feeling unattached to lovers, your children, spouse or other ranges of emotions such as ‘happy’, ‘grief’, ‘joy’ etc. If your range is ‘normal’ for you, then it would be difficult to know otherwise until perhaps you notice a difference within the context of comparison to several other people.
The bottom line is that your body could be mimicking the chemistry of your foetal condition – thereby affecting your endochrine system, neural pathways, neuropeptides etc.
When we think of emotional toxicity and the womb, we can quickly get the image of arguing parents, violent and traumatic experience, a mother’s deep stress etc. However, there are many layers to emotional toxicity and the womb you may have found yourself in as a developing foetus.
Firstly though, just how does a womb become emotionally toxic and how could that have affected me? From a purely physiological point of view, then each and every emotion felt my the mother has a direct impact on her body chemistry – and extreme emotions have a greater effect on body chemistry and what it present in the blood stream. However, within the scope of this topic within this article, it is important to understand the nature and role of the energy body.
As humans we are far more than our physical body, but we also have subtle energy bodies that make up the many layers and dimensions of what has been called the auric field. As part of our energy body we have chakras. Chakras, just like our physical body, develop as we get older. As infants and as a foetus, we have no shields, screens or protective valves on our chakras. This may seem to be a faulty design. However, the system was designed with the ideal situation in mind – a mother who felt loved and nurtured by her own parents, loved, nurtured and adored by her husband, and both parents holding the child as precious and adored – without hindrance or distortion. With this in mind, the child both unborn and newly born is filled and imbued with the love and adoration of its parents and the love that flows between the mother and father and from this begin to gain a deep sense of itself and its place in the world. The system is designed to create complete and whole human beings.
What is clear is that few or none of us received this, or anything even approaching it as we are for the most part born to parents with their own unresolved traumas. As our young and developing chakras were designed to freely allow all of our parents love in, they also allow all of their fear, rage, hatred and self hatred to pour in and we have little to no defence against it – save no incarnating fully and being dissociated from both body and feelings.
Emotional toxicity in the womb is heavily influence by the following:
– A mother who has been taught to hate her body, bodily function and sexual function through direct and indirect religious abuse or a misogynistic culture
– Hostility between mother and the father
– Conception as a result of rape, incest, forced marriage or an arranged marriage not to her liking
– Lack of support, stress, rejection by parents
– Does not want to be pregnant
– Failed attempted abortion, discussion of abortion, adoption, decision to adopt
– Miscarriages and stillbirths.
– Separation from the child’s father (father at war, another town, country etc)
– Mother’s unresolved depression, anger and other feelings from her own childhood
– Father’s rejection of the child/pregnancy
– Strong desire for the opposite gender of the foetus. For example, a strong desire for parents to have a boy and you are a girl or vice versa. For the womb to become emotionally toxic with this, it usually requires one or both parents to have a strong emotional feeling. Something like: ‘I don’t want a boy, he’ll turn out just like his/my father’, ‘Please, not a girl, and all girls are trouble’.
There are many circumstances that can lead to, create and sustain an emotionally toxic womb, all of which leave footprints on our emotional body and can become the foundation of self hatred, worthlessness and a deep sense of not belonging.
It is important to say that both Chemical and Emotional womb toxicity also have an astral component, and often the astral component is in fact the main aspect of the toxicity. Although Astral and Emotional Toxicity go hand in hand, I wanted to make the distinction as Astral Toxicity can involved astral objects, entities and cords, which of course have a strong emotional component, but are seen differently in the auric field and are worked with differently by a trained healer.
Miscarriages and Abortions
Medical science is now just beginning to recognise that a cellular and chemical footprint is left behind by all occupants of any given womb – stems cells are present. When there is trauma present, as is the case of many miscarriages, and all abortions, then the footprint is also astral.
In my work as a healer I have frequently seen astral object representing a foetus that was not carried to term residing inside the uterus of my female clients, often decades after and abortion or a miscarriage. As a new child that is carried to full term and is born comes into being, it then shares its uterine home with the ghosts of pregnancies past. This in and of itself can cause the developing foetus to fear that it may be similarly lost or disposed of. In some cases, especially in the case of disappearing twin syndrome, the developing foetus can merge with the astral remnant of the dead sibling and live well into adulthood with another consciousness influencing how its life unfolds – living the fate of two individuals, not just their own.
Ejaculation & Fertilisation
At ejaculation not only is it the sperm that is projected upwards to the uterus, but also his auric field. What I’ve observed is that his aura creates the equivalent of a stream of energy, or a road, that the sperm then follow towards their goal. As his energy field extends well into the uterus, bathing and encapsulating the egg in his energy, the sperm then instinctively know what they are looking for as the egg has been claimed. What happens then is that a new unique being is created from holographic copies of the father’s auric field, the mother’s auric field and then the unique energy of the incoming soul. Both the egg and the sperm have auric fields that are holographic duplicates of the parent’s lower energy bodies*.
What is important to understand here is that when the father is under the influence of alcohol or recreational drugs at the time of conception, then the integrity of his energy field is compromised and what he can deliver into the uterus and to the waiting unfertilised egg can be much more than energy and sperm. Along with that his trauma, emotional state and unknown entities can all travel along with the ejaculate, usually arriving long before the sperm does. If the father comes from a culture or a family in which spouses and children are seen as property then his energy will stake its claim to the womb and the child, robbing the developing foetus of a healthy sense of self.
Sex, Drug and Rock n’ Roll
When the male companions of women are high on drugs or alcohol the men can leave all sorts of astral objects behind, some of which end up in the uterus and can lodge there having an impact on the foetus and its sense of safety. When someone is high on drugs their boundaries begin to dissolve energetically which can then cause a couple of things to happen:
– Lack of discernment as to whom or what we let in
– An open field that allows and attracts lower astral entities
– An unclear boundary between self and other
When under the influence of substances our normal boundaries are relaxed or dissolved – this leads to sexual partners literally leaving a part of them behind.
Invasive and Unwelcome Cords
If a mother is having an affair with someone outside of her primary relationship, then the foetus can be aware of both men and also keenly feel the mother’s conflict. It becomes more complicated when both men believe that the child is theirs and both ‘claim ownership’.
Such claims of ownership can be as subtle as ‘this child is mine’ and more aggressive claims of ownership. I’ve seen cords invading the womb that have originated form grandmothers, grandfathers, other relatives and even ex partners. I have written previously on Chakra Cords, Cord Cutting and Family Constellation work, so please refer to those articles for more information concerning cords and energetic relationships.
If you go to a professionally trained healer, meaning, someone who has done at least 2 to 3 years or more of professional training and follow up supervision, then much of what I’ve written about can be resolved through energy healing work, which in my view should also include a sound approach to Family Constellation principles within the context of one on one work.
Notes for Healers
I have found this to be very delicate work and one that requires both energy hygiene and great care. Within the scope of my own practice I have developed a ‘technique**’ that involves me shifting my entire astral field into a different time period – usually the time period of the mother’s womb somewhere between six and 16 weeks of pregnancy. Once I arrive at my ‘time destination’ I then approach the womb’s outer auric wall and ask permission to enter. These are my basic steps:
It is important to say that not all of these steps take place in ONE session; sometimes they do, but not often.
– Create a capsule of another time and place in my astral field (4th level for BB people)
– Remove astral debris such as sludge
– Check for the ‘ghosts’ of previous womb occupants (miscarriages and abortions). With permission, re-unite these lost parts with the soul of the departed
– Check for invasive cords, unhealthy cords. Clean, clear, remove if clearly guided to do so.
– Make contact with the cells and stem cells of the foetus, regulate your energy field to compensate for a young delicate system, and start to remove the energy imprints left by alcohol and recreational drugs, inform cells that these are foreign substances, support the developing spleen and liver to dispose of these substances. Run gentle energies into the myofascial membranes of the foetal body that in effect raises the vibration so that the lower energies of alcohol, nicotine and cocaine cannot find a host.
– Work closely with your healing guides, be fully grounded, remember that it is delicate work
– When you feel complete and you’ve checked how your client is doing, complete with saying thank you to her mother and father’s higher selves for letting you in. Seal as if surgery has taken place, move your astral time bubble back into the here and now.
– Commence with further cellular work in the current time and space with your client.
My two Asterixes**
*I’ve only seen holographic copies of levels one to three and aspects of level 4 around an egg. I do not ‘believe’ that the 5th and above levels present in the sperm of egg during fertilisation. However, logic tells me that they might. If you’ve seen more levels and have worked with this, I welcome contact. As I am very much an ‘astral bunny’, my view at times can be limited to my particular keyhole.
**Techniques. I have a general distaste for techniques, for how they are taught, how they are learnt and for how they are used. Techniques can get in the way of heart centred presence with a client and can interfere with your own natural inner guidance when you are authentically connected to source. Most of what I know has been given to me by as many non-physical teachers are physical ones. The dilemma is this: If you are untrained and have not attended more than a couple of weekend of energy healing trainings (Reiki etc), do not attempt any of the above. If you are trained, be cautious, be fully present with yourself and your client, and let an authentically grounded heart guide you.
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4 thoughts on “Toxic Womb, Toxic sperm – A Story of Renewal”
“Toxic womb” makes sense to me. I am the third and last daughter of my parents and
I have taken over or have been experiencing (I do not know how to express it) my first
sister’s agony. She was a still birth (7th month), not wanted as my parents were not married
yet, great stresss for my mother,who put bandages around her belly to hide it. My sister
was born dead one day after marriage.
I am using schizoid defense to a big degree as if I need to hide my existence on earth.
My big fear of annihilation as my sister might have experienced in the womb and before conception.
Thank you for your very open sharing. That is indeed quite a fate to have inherited. Much love, Shavasti
Thank you for sharing so personally Andrea. I’m glad that you appear to have some working knowledge of characterology. Indeed, a toxic womb can certainly contribute to a schizoid defence and not feeling safe in the world. with love, Shavasti
Thank you; that was a very interesting read.